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Friday, May 8, 2009

Broken......

The title sounds kinda depressing doesn't it? I think about breaking things - like the time I broke this amazing dish that belonged to my grandmother. AWFUL!! My maternal grandmother died 3 months before I was born so I never knew her, but I've always been told how much I look like her and act like her too. (scary) My paternal grandmother died when I was 5 so I've never had the joy of having that relationship in my life. Isn't it funny how the Lord works because all I ever knew was my maternal grandfather (paternal died when I was five - about 2 months before my grandma) and I LOVED my Pawpaw! I mean LOVED him! He would tell me all the time that I was his favorite. In fact, he would tell EVERYONE I was his favorite! LOL You know my siblings and cousins just LOVED that?! LOL Now my kids only have their grandmothers in their lives. Both of their grandfathers are in heaven. Hmmmm.
So anyway, (sorry for the rabbit hole there) I broke that dish that was my Mawmaw Millie's and I was torn up about it. I tried to glue all the pieces together, but it wasn't happenin! I still have all the broken pieces in a box - I just can't bring myself to throw them out. Sad, I know. So my theme today is broken. My foot is broken. Yes it is. I fell during our kids program Sunday night at church into a bucket of kazoos - yes I said kazoos - and landed on the outside of my foot breaking a bone. SPECIAL! It still kinda hurts, but I can walk and I have a very lovely big blue shoe to wear for Mother's Day. In fact, the UC Doc says "Happy Mother's day" as he puts this hideous thing on my foot Tuesday morning. (yes, I waited til Tuesday to go to the Dr)
Broken. UGH. So during this time of no computer that's kinda where the Lord has had me. Broken in such a way that He has had to heal and then fill me. I love that about Him! He's had me in His Word more than ever. He's put a new love for His Word in my heart like never before. I mean, every time something comes up I'm finding Scriptures to go with it. I even whipped some out on my kids when a note came home from school - and no it wasn't "Honor your father and mother so that your days may be long" (that's from the Valarie International Version by the way). It was Scripture about their particular behavior and how sin breaks the Lords' heart. He's making His Word come to LIFE in this house and I LOVE it!
So, while I've been broken, both literally and figuratively, I can truly say that the Lord makes beauty from ashes! So often the Lord breaks us because He knows there's things that need to be healed, cleaned and repaired in us. It's not fun. Breaking something never is. But oh, the finished product is worth it!! So, I can say that I've been thankful for this time away. I've missed checking in on friends and being able to keep up with things via email, etc. but I wouldn't trade the time with my Lord for ANYTHING!!! It's shown me what matters. What He wants. What He demands. What He deserves!
Next time let's just hope there's no kazoos involved!!! ;-)

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